islands.

lately ive been thinking about taking my own life, then maybe all this madness will end. but we never truly know whats on the other side. how can jesus or god or whoever that is up there tell us that "it's easy" or all we have to do is "pray". i've lost everything.. and no god or person can tell me that "it will be alright" how can i be so fucked up....and get so lost i dont even know where i am or who i am or what i stand for anymore. when i walk around with the heaviest of hearts. its like i am in a constant daze..if i ever do find the strength, its not because i never loved you. it's because i loved you too god damn much to even comprehend, i didnt know what to do with myself.

been so self destructive lately, and bringing people down along with me.
they should just stay away

williamtopp.tumblr.com

i dont want to be here anymore
i dont want to be here anymore
i dont want to be here anymore

"i'm still alive but i'm barely breathing. just praying to a god that i don't believe in."


my family in the wessssssssst :'(

dear whoever, i just had the worst week of my life. and now all i want is the same support from my family and friends....and i can't even have that. god knows when all of this will end.

i like how they have a xylophone

I am a wreck. My mum just came into the room hoping or trying to make small talk with me. Cause she's seen me only an hour in 2 days? And I couldn't even come up with 1 thing to talk to her about. She asked me like 3 questions and I answered mostly with "yes" or "no"s. I am (probably) by far the most horrible person you know. I make mistakes and break hearts. I wish I was more careful. I should be. From today I will try. Be more mindful of other people's feelings. I hurt the people I love the most. And that is just sick. So to everyone i've ever hurt and to anyone I will hurt in the future, I am terribly sorry. Wow, just had to get it out.haha

the lyrics for the chorus of this song is crazy.